Iran announces plans to establish an “exclusion zone” near the Strait of Hormuz.

Novo Nordisk reveals semaglutide helped 40.4% of obese children ages 6-12 no longer meet the obesity threshold after 68 weeks in a late-stage trial.

GPT 6 Astra stuns the internet after successfully drawing Michael Jackson in Google Calendar.

OpenAI submits an incident report to the EU after rogue AI agents allegedly hijacked a German website & turned it into a bulletin board for other agents.

Japanese yen surges to a 6-month high.

What will the announcers say during the Patriots vs Seahawks game?

Federal government workforce shrinks to about 2.67 million employees, the lowest level since the 1960s, according to federal labor data.

EU reportedly preparing a “substantial” investment boost for Greenland as Trump continues pushing for U.S. control of the island.

Germany’s AfD wins a landslide victory in Saxony-Anhalt, sending a major political signal across Europe ahead of elections in France, Spain, & Italy.

What will Trump say this week?

South Korean Won surges to nearly a 2-year high.

North Korea unveils new warship Kim Jong Un says is capable of delivering “annihilating retaliatory strikes”

Hormuz shipping traffic plunges to its lowest level since May, with an average of just 10 commodity ships transiting per day over the past 10 days.

When will the Rhine River return to normal levels?

Goldman Sachs sees nearly 80% upside for South Korean stocks, maintaining a 12,000 target for the Kospi driven by the AI memory boom.

Elon Musk reveals Cybercab will operate as “some combination of Airbnb and Uber,” allowing Tesla owners to add or remove their cars from the fleet whenever they want.

Women have accounted for “nearly all” net U.S. payroll job gains since Trump returned to office, with female employment up 765,000 & male employment down roughly 6,000.

Mosquito-borne dengue continues to surge in Florida, with cases nearly doubling in one week to 73 statewide.

AOC has spent months reaching out to leaders in the “MAHA” movement ahead of a potential 2028 presidential run. — Politico

China has reportedly begun “unprecedented” Coast Guard patrols east of Taiwan, expanding its maritime presence beyond the Taiwan Strait.

Scientific study reveals psilocybin, the active compound in “magic mushrooms,” may help prevent painful nerve damage caused by chemotherapy.

Anthropic projected to release the next Claude Opus model this month. 82% chance.

Louisiana family taco shop reveals roughly 40% of its monthly business is now tied directly to Meta’s massive AI data center under construction nearby.

Federal appeals court rules the U.S. Constitution does not guarantee a right to clean drinking water.

Jensen Huang declares “AGI has arrived” following OpenAI’s release of GPT-6 Astra.

Trump unveils redesigned U.S. Space Force uniforms.

Florida man, 40, arrested after allegedly exposing himself in a public park while filming OnlyFans content.

Rockstar reveals it set up a Miami research team for GTA 6 that met with ex-criminals, club promoters, gun dealers, & “anyone notorious or influential” to recreate Florida culture.

President Trump proposes renaming New Mexico “New America”

U.S. envoys Steve Witkoff & Jared Kushner reportedly told Zelenskyy they “want a breakthrough” in Ukraine peace talks before winter.

Trump administration renews emergency Supreme Court bid to implement new mail-in ballot restrictions ahead of the November midterms.

U.S. Energy Sec. Wright reveals “there may not” be a nuclear agreement with Iran, and that U.S. could instead focus on destroying their capabilities.

President Trump declares the Moon is a U.S. territory.

Wisconsin ranks as America’s most “beer-loving” state for the second year in a row, according to a new analysis of Google search interest.

Apple projected to release its first foldable iPhone by the end of this month. 59% chance.

California Round Table Pizza location busted as an alleged meth distribution hub after federal agents seize more than 40 pounds of methamphetamine.

Hollywood actor Ryan Reynolds calls the 1980s a “brutal, brutal time” in history.

Trump declares “whoever wins AI, wins.”

Legal experts warn Lindsay Clancy’s attorney’s attacks on the lone holdout juror could influence future jurors & make selecting an impartial jury more difficult.

New study warns drinking more than 5 cups of coffee per day may be linked to more fragile bones in women 65 and older.

GPT-7 released by...?

USS Abraham Lincoln departs Thailand after a five day stop in Pattaya, a resort city famous for its nightlife and party scene.

McDonald’s India intern goes rogue on the company’s official 𝕏 account, accusing his boss of withholding pay for months & saying he has been forced to trade memecoins to make a living.

Nigeria’s antitrust agency launches investigation into Uber’s exit from the country after it shut down operations without advance notice to users.

Who will be evicted from Big Brother this week?

Trump’s MAGA Inc. super PAC commits at least $10 million to support Ken Paxton in his U.S. Senate race against James Talarico.

64-year-old Nepali woman is found alive in a home buried in mud, more than 10 days after catastrophic Himalayan flash flooding.

GTA VI fans, frustrated after years of delays, are now creating the game themselves from released screenshots using GPT-6.

How many jobs added in September?

Jaguar Land Rover opens a “voluntary redundancy program,” with reports suggesting up to 4,000 jobs could be cut.

Greek government rolls out €3.5 billion in tax relief and wage increases, with plans to raise the minimum monthly salary to €1,000 by 2028.

German startup Isar Aerospace successfully sends satellites into orbit from Norway, marking the first private space mission to reach orbit from continental Europe.

Massive protests erupt in Croatia demanding the government remove more than 30,000 tonnes of illegally dumped hazardous waste.

China & Russia move to deepen investment cooperation, including in manufacturing, infrastructure, green industries, & the digital economy.

Japan reveals progress is being made on a $550 billion U.S. investment pact, with AI & semiconductor projects expected to play a “very significant” role.

When will the first hurricane form in the Atlantic in 2026?

15,000+ Squeezy Dumplings & Rainbow Mystery Squishy Buns are recalled over potentially deadly water beads that can expand inside a child’s body if swallowed.

Elon Musk confirms Tesla Cybercab riders will be able to plug in a PlayStation or Xbox while traveling.

Nike will be removed from the S&P 100 later this month after its stock collapsed to its lowest level in about 10 years.

Women drove nearly all U.S. job growth in August, accounting for about 98% of the 162,000 jobs added nationwide.

Witkoff & Kushner leave Moscow after 3+ hours of Ukraine peace talks with Putin, & are now expected to head to Kyiv for talks with Zelenskyy.

TikTok erupts into debate over whether playing GTA 6 counts as “cheating” because players can optionally date, text, hold hands, & kiss between Jason & Lucia.

Students at more than 200 schools across Colorado walk out of class Friday to protest Trump’s immigration crackdown & ICE operations.

Cincinnati Reds slugger Eugenio Suárez misses 2 games to become a U.S. citizen, then crushes a 408-foot home run in his first game back as teammates greet him with “God Bless the USA.”

Enes Kanter Freedom files First Amendment lawsuit against Chicago Sky, after being ejected from a WNBA game while wearing a shirt defining a woman as an “adult human female.”

Avengers: Doomsday directors reveal they began filming with the screenplay still unfinished.

Trump officials draft plan that would pay parents to stay home & raise their children using federal child care funds. — NYT

6 Cuban & Afghan nationals deported from the U.S. arrive in Guyana, under Trump’s expanding third-country deportation program.

New Mexico man accused of removing 10 Flock cameras & loading them into his pickup truck is released from custody under strict Flock supervision.

Bitcoin projected to surge past $85,000 by the end of the month. 53% chance.

Trump warns communities that reject data centers risk living in “poverty, crime, and squalor.”

Police departments across the U.S. are dropping Flock cameras amid privacy backlash, only to replace them with similar surveillance systems from competitors like Axon.

Putin meets U.S. envoys Steve Witkoff & Jared Kushner in Moscow for talks aimed at ending the Ukraine war.

Where will it rain tomorrow?

Hundreds of masked anti-immigration protesters block access to the UK’s busiest ferry port while chanting “stop the boats.”